Summer Blues in a Worry Box

As school wound down and summer began…for other children it’s an exciting time…free time…fun time – woohoo NO HOMEWORK, no worries – be happy!  However, for sensory kids it can be overwhelming – the changing of schedules and routines, more people and visits, vacation and/or staycations.  Even the clothing…making that transition from warm clothes to shorts, ooooh my, and especially tennis shoes/boots to sandals.  It’s always an adjustment period I know.

But, this year we had a rough start.  Rough start to summer that is.  Our 10 year old is homeschooled, he has a sibling in public school.  One would think he would enjoy his brother being home all day….and he does in small doses, except it’s more talking, different routines, more interaction…he likes his bubble and his alone time, and yes, my undivided attention.  It’s changed. Change is hard.  It took about a month to smooth out for his temperament to adjust as he had many outbursts, anger fits, and a super loooong meltdown.  Breaks my heart when he still will ask,  “Why do I act like I do?” and say, “I don’t mean it.”  I know he doesn’t mean to hit himself, call himself dumb, break things.  I know his heart.  I know it’s good.  I know he’s smart.

We created a ‘worry box’.  He covered it with construction paper and was content with it (Louisville Cardinals- red & white).  The purpose is for him to write down his worry – place it in the box and when he is ready we pull it out to read and talk about it, validate it- find a solution, if possible….NOT in the moment, but later when he is calm and is ready to fully listen – maybe have his favorite snack or have him swinging in his sensory swing. His first one stated, “going in the cherch.”  I was surprised because he’s never mentioned being nervous going into the church before- he goes practically every Wednesday evening- by himself!!!  And he loves vacation Bible school – however, he said he was nervous because there were so many children and it was too noisy, too much talking.  He did not want to go.  I didn’t make him.  Maybe next year.  He is content participating in the small youth group Wednesday evenings and that makes him happy.

Back to the ‘worry box’…it certainly is a start, hopefully, to engage his thoughts and worries to a better understanding of why and how we can help him overcome his very real concerns and alleviate negative behavior.  It’s all worth a try!

For now, we are steady and ready and building his self-esteem because he is GOOD.  He is smart.  Striving for worry-free days.

Sensory Kiddos and Swimming

Summer is upon us and so comes the ‘real’ struggles our kids face while swimming.  Listed below are a few pointers to think about and do to help understand our child:

Smells. Chlorine in the pools has a distinct and powerful smell and the lake and ocean water has a distinct odor as well that may disturb some sensory kids. My son has an initial first reaction to the smells but we hang out and play in the sand, or play other games until he seems to acclimate to his new surroundings when he is ready he will go.  You can check out your options, understand your child and be patient.

Getting their face wet. Very often, the biggest challenge for a child with sensory processing issues is to get his face wet. Wearing goggles and masks often is very soothing to kids because these items keep part of the child’s face and eyes dry, helps him to see better in the water, and provides a nice amount of calming pressure against the back of the head.  I didn’t realize how helpful this was until my son borrowed his brother’s large goggles.  I couldn’t believe the difference of him in the water playing – he doesn’t swim without the large goggles now and he still often comes up to wipe his face off on the towel- and that is OK.

Noises and movement. We know kids love to play in the water- by knowing this we know there are many loud noises- squealing, laughing, yelling and splashing in and around the water. For a child with auditory and visual processing differences these noises and movements are very unexpected and it can provoke anxiety.  Plan your trips swimming and possibly swim during times that are less crowded.  We will move if necessary further away from others- not that we are being rude- just he needs his space.

Temperature.   This is a real issue for some kids.  Your child may be very reluctant to enter a pool where the temperature is very different from the air.  We simply can’t throw them in as our parent’s did to us to get use to it- it doesn’t work that way.  They must go on their own terms and to help with this- try having them shower beforehand and gradually change the temperature so the water won’t be such a shock to their system when entering a pool.  Or if at the lake or ocean gradually have them splash water on their feet, legs and keep going until he is comfortable with the temperature and he has a sense of control over the feeling.  I let my guy, on his own terms, get in the water- it takes time but eventually he is in and I give NO pressure!

Motor planning. Swimming takes motor planning skills, which many sensory kids find challenging. My little guy, we hope, will learn to fully swim this year….he’s 9 now.  He learned to doggy paddle last summer.  (His older brother is a fish in the water – always has been.)  His coordination he always found so difficult to manage- and that is OK.  It takes time and we have high hopes that this will be the year!!!  We try every year.  Be patient the butterfly will emerge- eventually.

Footwear & Swimwear. Walking on rough and even hot surfaces such as parking lots, sidewalks, cement near the pools and even the sand and grass can feel excruciating to a sensory kid.  I always have water shoes on my son while at the lake.  Granted the adjustment period is there for him to wear them….BUT, once he makes that adjustment to his new shoes he wears them constantly while swimming…I believe it helps alleviate the different textures and temperatures.  As to the swimwear – try different swimwear to see what your child can tolerate- some may like the speedo type and others don’t seem to mind so much the hanging wet shorts.

Swimming season brings on new challenges but with patience and understanding not only can your SPDer have a great time swimming so can the entire family.  Enjoy the memories being made!